Loss aversion: encourage more play with FOMO

Imagine you find a £20 note on the ground - a nice surprise, right? But now imagine losing £20 from your wallet. That feeling of loss probably stings more than the joy of finding money. This is loss aversion in action - the principle that people are more motivated to avoid losses than to achieve equivalent gains.

For parents, loss aversion can be a powerful tool to nudge your child towards independent play. Instead of only highlighting the benefits of screen-free time, framing play in terms of what she loses by choosing screens can be a more effective motivator.

Did you know? The concept of loss aversion was introduced by Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky in 1979 as part of prospect theory, which explains how people weigh potential losses more heavily than gains.

How loss aversion works in play

Your child - just like adults - is highly sensitive to the idea of missing out. If she perceives that choosing screens means losing something valuable, she may be more inclined to engage in play instead. The key is to frame play opportunities as limited-time, special, or something she does not want to miss.

10 loss aversion nudges to encourage play

Here are ten simple nudges that use loss aversion to make play the irresistible choice:

• The play countdown. Use a timer to signal when a play opportunity is ending. "You have just 10 more minutes to build before we put the blocks away!" This makes your child more eager to engage before the chance is gone.
• The play streak challenge. Track how many days in a row your child engages in screen-free play. If she skips a day, she "loses" her streak and has to start over, making her more motivated to keep it going.
• Limited-time play invitations. Create exclusive, time-bound play opportunities. "The fort-building challenge is only available this afternoon!" This makes the activity feel scarce and more valuable.
• The toy rotation trick. Put some toys away and bring them back after a few weeks. The idea that toys will "disappear" for a while increases their desirability and encourages your child to engage while she can.
• The screen swap rule. When your child asks for screen time, remind her of what she is giving up: "You can watch TV, but that means missing out on making your own Lego city. What do you want to do?" This reframes the decision as a potential loss.
• The “almost gone” play option. Make certain play experiences feel rare: "This cardboard castle will only be here until tomorrow - after that, it’s going away!" Scarcity increases engagement and urgency.
• The memory jar motivation. Keep a jar of play memories (photos, drawings, or notes about fun past activities). Show your child what she could be adding to the jar if she chooses play instead of screens.
• The friend FOMO effect. Use social proof by showing how other children are playing: "Your friends played outside today and had so much fun! Do you want to join next time so you do not miss out?"
• The weekend play forecast. Plan a special play activity and talk it up in advance: "On Saturday, we are doing an outdoor treasure hunt! You will not want to miss it!" The anticipation makes the activity feel more important.
• The play investment trick. Leave an unfinished play project visible (a half-built puzzle, a Lego structure in progress). Your child naturally wants to "protect" her effort and complete what she started, making her less likely to abandon it for screens.

Why loss aversion works

Instead of forcing play, loss aversion gently nudges your child into making the choice herself - because she does not want to miss out. By making play opportunities feel limited, special, and valuable, you can help her prioritise creative, independent play over passive screen time.

Try one of these loss aversion nudges this week! Which one do you think will work best in your home?